Touhou x Umineko Crossover - The Yukari's boredom
by Kyubey11
Summary: Yukari got bored one day and decided to gap various people from Gensokyo to Rokkenjima island during the major events of the Golden Witch and stuff. Watch as our heroines and the Ushiromiya family and co react to each other. Comedy is ensured.
1. Chapter 1

Umineko x Touhou Crossover

This is pretty much my crossover first fanfic ever, soooooo if I do post this which I probably will.. Give some feedback..Or not.. Whichever you want. Please note that Touhou nor Umineko do not belong to me. Touhou is the owner of Zun and Umineko is the owner of 07th Expansion. All credit for Touhou and Umineko goes to them and not me.

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"Raaaaaaaaaaaan~" an incredibly bored and irritated voice was heard lying down on the floor in a residence. "I'm boooooooooooored" said the woman with the long blonde hair and red eyes. She wore a dress with a few yin-yang symbols on it, it was white and purple. She also wore a big hat with a red ribbon on the front.

"What would you like to do ?" asked another woman, except she was a little taller, also wore a white robe like dress with a big blue stripe going down the fron with some symbols on it and such. She also wore a hat with two pointy ends on the top left and right, almost like they were meant for cats ears.. or fox ears.

"I dunno.. I was asking you!" , or is more commonly known as Yukari made a pouty face.

"Go visit other dimensions again instead of starting a disaster, you remember what happened when Reimu found out didn't you?" Yukari suddenly looked worried, remembering that traumatic experience.

"Never again... Oh well! hmm which dimension to mess with..." Yukari opened up a gap, it had red ribbons on each side and it was dark inside, countless red eyes could be seen within it. "OH! HERE'S ON INTERESTING ONE!"

The taller woman, otherwise known as 'Ran Yakumo' looked interested. "What are you going to do master?" she asked with a somewhat worrying undertone.

Yukari shot up from the ground and thought about who to gap to the other dimension. "Hmmm... Gotta gap Reimu there as revenge.. But who else?" She thought on.

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Meanwhile at the Hakurei Shrine!

"Why do I never get any donations?.. I AM ONE OF IF NOT THE STRONGEST IN GENSOKYO! PEOPLE SHOULD LEARN TO BE MORE GREATFUL AND-" the miko rambled on. She wore a red-white shrine maiden outfit with a big red white ribbon on the top of her black hair. She had hazel eyes and black female shoes. Her outfit exposed her armpits, seriously what is it with shrine maidens and exposed armpits in Gensokyo?

"AND FURTHERMORE, WHY DON'T PEOPLE EVER GIVE ME STUFF AS A TOKEN OF GRATITUDE! I SAVE THEIR ASSES FROM GETTING EATEN BY YOUKAI AND STUFF! WHY DON-" She was cut off by a gap suddenly opened beneath her feet and she fell through it. "What the!? YUUUUUKAAAAARRRRIIIIIIII!" And the shrine maiden was gone from Gensokyo~

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Meanwhile at the Scarlet Devil Mansion!

"Koakuma? would you do me favour and please check that my forbidden spell tomes are safe within section C 7179 please? I think Flandre may have borrowed it again without asking.." said the girl in the chair reading a book on 'Setting up traps for thieves'. She wore a purple gown, it had various thin white stripes running down the front middle, she had purple shoes on with red and blue ribbons on each of them. She had a big purple hat on with a big moon crest adorned on the front of it. She had purple hair with a pony tail running down the front of her body by her shoulder, it wasn't that long but was still at considerable length, it had a blue and red ribbon on it.

"Yes Patchouli-Sama!" said the girl, she had red hair with red eyes, and had a somewhat buisness woman suit on, she had miniature black wings on the top of her had and black leathery wings coming out of her back. She had a black tail which had a pointed arrow at the end of it. Koakuma flew off to check.

"Hmmm.. Oh, this looks like a nice trap to stop that BOOK THIEF! WHY DOES SHE ALWA- *Cough cough*" sadly, Patchouli Knowledge suffers from asthma. "I really need to do something about this asthma an-" the bookworm was suddenly cut off by a surpise gap opening beneath her, she fell through. "No..! I haven't finished my tea and chocolate biscuits yet! NOOOOOOOOO-" Patchouli also had disappeared now. "Patchouli-sama! I think Flandre or Marisa took the book agai- hey where did she go?..."

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Meanwhile at Kappa Village!

"Yes...Yes! YES! IT'S AAAALLLLIIIIIVVVVVEEEEE! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" said the slightly manical girl. She had blue hair with two large pig-tail.. Pony tail.. THINGS! with red mini beads tying them in place so they don't undo. she also wore a blue hat cap, it had some sort of logo on the front of it. She wore a blue kappa dress with blue boots. She looked pretty innocent aside from the evil laughter..

"Yes... IT'S FINALLY FINISHED! my pop tarts are done! :D " ...Yep, she was building-errr making poptarts. "Let's see... Equipment, check.. Poptarts, check.. Clothing, check.. Danmaku cards, check.. All set!" the shy little kappa known as 'Nitori Kawashiro' started making her way to the door out of her laboratory eating her poptarts when suddenly... ANOTHER GAP OPENS UNDER HER FEET AND SHE FALLS THROUGH! she dropped her poptarts too sadly.. "Wai- WHA!? NOOOOO! AT LEAST LET ME GET MY POPTARTS! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO-" and thus she was also no longer in Gensokyo...

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Meanwhile in the underground of Gensokyo on floor 666!

"Why do I have to guard this STUPID bridge all day!? it's pointless! EVERYONE GETS PAST ITT ANYWAY! D:" The rampaging girl had blonde hair, emerald green eyes and slightly pointy ears. She wore a black skirt with white frills under it and these triangular shaped red ribbon..Things going all around under the skirt and the white part. She wore a brown vest with a blue shirt under it which had a white criss cross pattern on it. She also had a white ascot around her neck. She had black shoes on, similar to Reimu's shoes.

"UGH! why does everyone else get to play outside and do stuff!? I'm so JEALOUS! UUUUUGGGGHHHH! it's not fair... I DON'T GET PAID ENOUGH TO THIS CRAP! Wait... I DON'T GET PAID AT ALL!" as the girl known as 'Parsee Mizuhashi' ranted about her stupid job as the bridge guard, a gap suddenly opened up beneath her feet, causing her to fall in. "WHAAAAAAAAAAA!?" And once again, another girl disappeared from Gensokyo.

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Meanwhile in the Bamboo Forest!

"TEWI! GET BACK HERE!" said the tall lunarian girl. She had bunny ears, purple hair, red eyes and black shoes. She wore a shirt along with a red tie and black skirt. She was chasing after a smaller lunarian known as 'Tewi Inaba'.

"Nope! YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME ALIVE RABBIT!" She was incredibly fast, she dodged all the bamboo stalkers that popullated the forest with great clarity. "Nyiheheheheheheheheehehe!" she laughed, mocking the taller Lunarian. Suddenly, a gap opened in front of her, she accidentily ran through it while running too fast. "NyiheheheHEH!?" the gap disappeared. "Tewi..? TEWI!? WHERE DID YOU GO!? TEEEEEEWWWWIIIIIII!" And thus Tewi was no longer in Gensokyo.

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Yukari: "Aaaaaand those are our entertainers! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA- *Cough cough wheeze* damn bugs.." Ran simply face-palmed.

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	2. Chapter 2 Patchouli And Nitori Encounter

Touhou x Umineko Crossover Chapter 2

This chapter takes place right after Reimu, Patchouli, Nitori, Parsee and Tewi get gapped by Yukari to rokkenjima island or however you spell it. The whole thing takes place when the Ushiromya (Sorry for my spelling) family first arrives at the island.

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*Gap* A gap appears above the ground on the island, on the beach just out of sight. "OOOOOOOOOOOOO-oh?" It was Nitori, she looked around, it appears she was on a beach of some sort, the ocean sparkled in reflection to the suns brilliant light. The sand seemed soft and warm also due to the sun. She was hidden by some large rocks so she couldn't be seen..Yet.

"Where..Am I? wait... Gap...YUKARI! : ugh I can't believe this... I am desserted on this island with only a FEW advanced tech, BUT NO POP-TARTS!" She was starting to panic when she suddenly heard voices near by. It was a large group of people. One of them was saying to the other "Jessica! let me squeeze your breast!" the voice belonged to a red haired male, wearing a white tux and a red tie with a cross on it. He wore black slip-ons, he also had blue eyes.

Nitori: "! Humans! optical camoflage, optical camoflage, optical camoflage ACTIVATE!" as soon as she finished messing about with her optical camoflage tech she became invisible, ever since Reimu had beaten her that day because she managed to see her whilst invisible, she upgraded it so she could not be seen at all.

The red haired male gestured his hands as if he was about to grab this 'Jessica's' breast while making a drooling face. *Punch* The blonde haired female punched him in his face and scolded him "NO WAY YOU PERVERT! seriously Battler you haven't changed a bit.." looks like the 'perverts' name was Battler.

Battler: "Ow, ow, ow, ow... Jessica has not changed a bit for these past few years!" The rest of the human group laughed at his antics. "If you want to grope breasts so much Battler-sama, you could grope mine if you'd like" the strange, strange suggestion came from an old woman, she had grey hair, blue eyes and an apron on. She had working shoes on, she looked like a maid of some sort..

Both Battler and Jessica made a shocked face, Nitori couldn't blame them to be honest. Battler: "E-Errrrr no thanks Chiyo! hehe.." They backed off a little from the old woman. The group continued to laugh. "Uuuu! Uuuu! Uuuu! the shine uuuu! it's destroyed uuuu!" the voice came from a little girl who could be no older than 9 years old. She wore a white-pink skirt with black shoes (Similar to Parsee's) she had brown hair that went down to her shoulders, she has blue eyes and has a little black tiara with little gem stones encrusted on it.

Jessica: "What's up Maria?" the teenager looked a little worried about the youngest of the group. "The shrine uuuu! it's gone uuuuuuuuuuuu!" Nitori observed them, she went in to get a little closer but stepped on a twig which made a breaking sound loud enough to hear.

Battler: "Huh? who's there?" the humans looked anxious to see who was around the rocks. Nitori looked for a route to escape to. "Oh no, oh no, oh no!" she tried to fly off just like she normally would in Gensokyo, but it didn't work for some reason! "Crap, crap, crap!", she looked for an alternate way to escape, she caught site of a cliffe above her. But to make things worse her camo started to ware off!

Battler: "What the- who the heck are you?! a new servent?.. But you sure don't dress like the other servents that's for sure, you know who she is Chiyo?" he looked for help at the older woman. "No.. I've never seen her before in my life.." they all looked at the girl in blue. Nitori had no other choice.

Nitori: "SMOKE SCREEN ACTIVATE!" as soon as she said that smoke was all over the area. Nobody could see in front of them. "Now is my chance to escape!" she put on her special goggles which allowed her to see through smoke, solid objects and much more! she evaded the humans, cutting through them as they were trying to get out of the smoke. She almost made it when she was grabbed by one of the human.

The smoke screen wore off and it appeared that it was Battler who grabbed Nitori by the arm. Nitori: "Eeeeeeeeeek! Lemme go, lemme go, lemme go!" She was in a hysterical state, she didn't do so well with forced encounters with new people, especially humans.

Battler: "Wait! we just want to ask you some questions, like oh I don't know.. Oh I know, WHO ARE YOU!? and why do you have that smoke screen device!? your like 16 years old!"

Jessica: "Hold on Battler, don't be so harsh! but now that I think about it.. She looks a little familiar..."

Nitori: "nspdjnifhsiuhbeufhehsuhfpfhpvbpu" all the attention from the humans got to her. She passed out.

Jessica: "Wha- BATTLER! LOOK AT WHAT YOU DID YOU PERV!" Jessica seemed to blame him for Nitori passing out...

Maria: "Uuuuuuu! she's not human uuuuuuuu!" the little girl seemed to somehow know that Nitori wasn't human.

George: "What do you mean Maria? she looks human enough to me.." he looked confused. George also had a white tux on. He had similar but different slip-on shoes like Battlers. He had glasses and blueish-black hair. He wore a normal black tie.

Chiyo: "We need to Discuss this later, we need to get this poor girl to a bed where she can rest!" she looked worried for the little kappa.

The rest of the group seemed to agree. They rushed to the mansion. Battler was carrying Nitori on his back. Battlers mind: ("I know I may have caused this but..My god she's flat cheasted for a teenager!")

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Meanwhile in the basement!

*Gap* A gap opened in the basement where the furnace and such is, a certain book worm fell through.

Patchouli: "Muguyu~... A gap... This is Yukari's doing! first things first.. I need to find out where I am.." the youkai seemed to know what she was doing. "This looks like some sort of basement..Wait- basements have a lot of dust in..! I NEED TO GET OUTTA HERE!" she rushed up the stairs and out the door, she suffers from asthma so being in dusty places is not a great idea.

Patchouli: "I'm alive! okay, so let's see.. Finding out where I am normally comes first but.. i'm a little tired.." She wondered the mansions hallway, she peeked into a room which seemed to have two guest beds in it. "A bed...!" she immidiatly rushed to the bed, went under the blankets, lied down and fell asleep.

"Lalalalala~" a calm, gentle female voice could be heard coming through the door. "Need to make sure everything's ready for George-sama's and the others arrival!" it belonged to one of the servents. She wore black shoes, a black skirt and puffy black shirt. She wore an apron which covered the front of the skirt and her shirt. Her name was Shannon.

Shannon: "Hmmm.. Is somebody sleeing in the bed? I should just take a quick peek.. MAYBE IT'S GEORGE-SAMA!" after that little love thought she rushed to the bed, threw the blankets off, only to discover it was not George.

Shannon: "Wha..Your not George-sama! D:" she saw the little bookworm youkai. "...Oh, she's asleep.. I wonder who she is?.. Hmmmm... Huh?" she started to pick up on her magical wave-length. "What power! just who is this girl!?" Shannon then tried waking her up by poking her forhead with her finger. "Hey..Come on, wake up! ...Please?"

Patchouli: "Mu...Gyu..?" the hermit youkai was waking up! "...!" patchouli, shocked by Shannon's presence panicked and accidentily fell off the side of the bed. "Ow~" Shannon rushed to the other side of the bed and offered Patchy a hand up.

Shannon: "Oh my gosh, i'm so sorry about that!" said the servent, she seemed innocent and genuenly sorry for waking her up.

Patchouli: "I-it's fine.." she took the helping hand and got up from the floor."

Shannon: "Heh.. Sorry. By the way... Who might you be again" Shannon almost forgot to ask her.

Patchouli: "Hmmmm? oh.. Sorry about that... I am Patchouli Knowledge, I am a youkai from Gensokyo. I seemed to have ended up here because of a certain GAP YOUKAI! who gapped me to a different dimension..Which is here."

Shannon: "I knew you weren't human! your magic level is way to high!" said the servent triumphantly.

Patchouli sweat dropped. "Yes... You.. Are human but... You have a little magic in you..."

Shannon: "Ah!- yes, it's a long story.. But.. I prefer not to talk about it, for now anyway.. Would you like some tea by any chance ?"

The purple bookworm eyes sparkled, "Yes please!" she seemed to have a longing for tea because she didn't get to finish hers back in the Voile. The servent smiled, and left to go get some tea.

Patchouli: "She seems nice..But I musn't let my guard down.. I should probably ask her where I am when she get's back.. Hmmm.. Now that I think about it, is it possible that Yukari gapped others to this place too?" she got lost in thought.

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So that's it for chapter 2. I will be introducing the rest of the characters in the next chapter. I apologize if I mixed the descriptions and stuff up, I am too lazy to google it.


	3. Chapter 3 Tewi And Parsee Encounter

Touhou X Umineko Crossover Chapter 3

Yaaaaay chapter 3! I apologize for all the spelling and grammar mistakes I made on the last couple of chapters, I have been writing these and I am kinda sick soooo yeah.. Anyway, ONWARDS!

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Meanwhile in the mansions kitchen!

*Gap* A gap opened up in the kitchen, and a little lunarian fell through it onto the floor. Looking confused and bewildered, she got up and rapidly looked around, her eyes darting around the area.

Tewi: "Who!? what!? when!? where!? why!? WHERE AM I!?" the devious lunarian darted around the kitchen, knocking over pots and pans among other cutlery. "Where is this?! an- wait... I was taken here through a gap.. Yuuukkkaaaaarrrriiiiiii! I am so going to raid her house for this nyeh!"

She calmed down, looked around the kitchen for things to take, why? because she can that's why! "Let me see nyeh... Oooo a fridge!" she happily skipped towards the fridge, or how she calls it, the 'food locker'. She opened it and simply gasped at what she found.

Tewi: "WOW! SO MUCH FOOD! I wonder if there are any carrots.. Lemme see.. Oh, OH OH OH! CARROTS!" she discovered a whole draw full of adult carrots. "*Drool* S-s-so many! how will I carry them all though?.. Oh hey! I can use that conveniently placed purse bag over there!" she ran over to the bag and looked inside. "Huh.. It's full of make-up and crap.. Pfft, I won't need that! i'm sure whoever owns this bag won't mind, hehehe~" She emptied the bag onto the floor and stuffed it with all of the carrots.

Suddenly, voices could be heard coming from one of the doors to the kitchen. "I'm just saying, we should thoroughly interegate that blue haired girl! we have no idea who she is or how she even got here!" the voice was coming from a woman known as Eva, George's mother. (Too lazy to describe go google it).

Tewi looked around for an escape route or somewhere to hide, she saw no way out but spotted an empty cabinet, she dashed in it with her bag o' carrots and closed it's door behind her and listened.

Tewi peeked out of the small gap of the cabinet and saw Eva and one of the servents talking about someone. "I understand your point Eva-sama, but chiyo suggested that we musn't wake her up otherwise she might faint...Again..." the servent/buttlers name was Ghoda. He was old, but an effective worker (Again, go google his description and stuff).

Eva: "She is clearly dangerous! we looked through that big blue bag of hers and she had all this weird equipment and stuff! I don't want her around my Georgiekins! SHE EVEN SMOKED SCREENED HIM AND THE OTHERS!" She raged on and on about the blue girl. She was just worried about George and the others is all, this is what any other mother would do I guess.

Ghoda: "Again, I understand Eva-sama but.. Hm? wait.. Where are the carrots?" Ghoda just wanted to check the fridge for tonights meal preperations but all the carrots seemed to have mysteriously vanished.

Eva: "WHAT U TALKIN' ABOUT!? WE HAVE MOAR THINGS TO WORR- Hey where's my purse!? WHY IS MY MAKE-UP ALL OVER THE FLOOR!?" she noticed her missing bag and make-up. She went to pick up her stuff off the floor when she caught a glimpse of the crack in the cupboard.

Eva: "Who's there!?" She seemed to have spotted Tewi! what will she do now? will she go all lunarian on there asses?

Tewi: "Oh s***! what do I do now?!.. Only one option!" Tewi burst out of the cupboard and zig-zagged incredibly fast past Ghoda and Eva without dropping her goody bag.

Eva: "Wha- Another girl!? Wait- ARE THOSE RABBIT EARS!? HEY! GIVE ME MY PURSE BACK!" Eva started running after the lunarian and so did Ghoda, even though they should just give up because Tewi is simply too fast for them.

Tewi: "Nyehehehehehe! you'll never catch me BITCHES! let's see.. They were talking about a girl with a big blue bag and in blue clothing.. Wait, that sounds like that kappa Nitori! guess that's my next destination nyeh!" and thus she started running around the mansion looking for her.

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Meanwhile in the mansions garden!

*Gap* Yet another gap opens and a youkai of jealousy binding falls through.

Parsee: "Ouch! stupid floor! stupid Yukari! why does she only get to use gaps like other Yukari's do!? Why can't I use gaps? I'm so freking JEALOUS!" ignorant of the fact she was no longer in Gensokyo, she snaps out of her rant and looks around. "Hey..Where am I? wait.. If I am out of Gensokyo..Via gap travel.. I don't have to guard that bitch of a bridge anymore! WOOT!"

Parsee seemed really happy, she was never aloud outside due to her power and her duty to guard the bitchy bridge. But then it hit her.. "Hey, where am I anyway? a garden of some sort? oh hey it's a mansion! pretty big, but nothing compared to the Grand Earth Palace Of Spirits."

She looked around the garden, she spotted a patch of colourful flowers~ "Ooo pretty flowers! been a while since I saw so many of these things... They're so colourful..Why can't I be that colourful? i'm jealous...Jealous...Jealous!" whilst she was ranting, one of the servents named 'Kanon' spotted her and went up to her from behind, trying to talk to her. Kanon had a somewhat feminine build, yet he was male. (That's all ima say for the description XD)

Kanon: "Excuse me miss, but who in the golden land are you!?" asked the teenage buttler.

Parsee spun around to see Kanon, she was a little jealous of his feminine build. "That HAT! WHY CAN'T I HAVE A HAT LIKE THAT!? I'M JEALOUS!" Kanon sweat-dropped.

Kanon: "That..Doesn't.. Answer my question ma'am. Who are you? and how did you get to this island? none of the others mentioned anybody else but the Ushiromiya's coming here to this island on boat.."

Parsee: "(So i'm on an island of a sort..Interesting..) I am Parsee Mizuhashi, a youkai of jealousy binding. Who are you little gir- errr boy?

Kanon looked a little irritated by the fact he was almost called a girl. "A youkai!? but..But...How!? but then again, you do radiate quite a bit of magic.. And my name is Kanon."

Parsee: "I have waaay more magic than you ever could have 'Kanon' anyway, I got here by gap-dimension travel. That's all you need to know."

Kanon: "I'm afraid I require more information then that, but if your unwilling, I will have TO TAKE IT BY FORCE!" and at that moment, Kanon conjured up this weird beam sword from his hand, Parsee was, suprise, suprise, jealous.

Parsee: "..Why don't I have an epic magic sword!? I'M SO JEALOUS OF EVERYTHING ON THIS GOD DAMN ISLAND SO FAR! UGGGHHHH!" She was on the verge of snapping, kanon backed off a little because her magic level started to rage for some reason.

Kanon: "W-Wait! Miss, please calm down-" but before he finished Parsee started to attack.

Parsee: "Malice Sign: Midnight Anathema Ritual!" and at that moment, she stared shooting out oval shaped big blue orbs of light at Kanon, kanon managed to dodge them. Kanon: "CRAP! CALM DOWN! PLEA- Huh!?" he looked behind him because he sensed danger, he was right, the orbs of blue light he dodged were bouncing off walls and objects and turning into a paler blue going back towards him.

Kanon: "BWAH!" he jumped to the side and out of the way, he scrambled to his feet and ran inside the mansion.

Parsee: "That'll teach him.. Now then.. Guess I should start looking around~" she stopped her spell card and went into an alternate route into the mansion.

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That was it for chapter 3 :3

The next chapter should be about Reimu being gapped and some other stuff~


	4. Chapter 4 Reimu And Let The Murder Begin

Touhou x Umineko Crossover Chapter 4

So this is chapter 4. Yep. Kay have fun!

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Meanwhile in the mansions dinning room!

*GAP* Yet another gap opens! the last one to come through is none other than the red-white shrine maiden herself, Reimu Hakurei!

Reimu: "FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF- YUKARI! GAP ME OUT OF HERE THIS INSTANT! ...You are going to pay for this. Oh yes, you will suffer the WRATH OF THIS SHRINE MAIDEN! okay.. Until that gap hag get's me outta here, I need to find out where I am, if i'm alone and if there are any hostiles around here." She looked around the area for interesting things.

Voices could be heard about to walk into the room. The shrine maidens survival instincts kicked in so she hid under the long ass table which was covered in cloth so she could not be seen.

Rudolph: "I'm just saying Kyrie, Eva might have hallucinated, I mean come on! a little girl with rabbit ears? really?" (Rudolph is Battlers father, and kyrie's husband, go google for more info).

Reimu: "Little girl?.. Rabbit ears?.. Tewi! so i'm not alone... I should keep listening to get more info." and so she did.

Kyrie: "I know it sounds rediculous hun, but Eva looked really serious when she told us! I really do think she was telling the truth, plus this little girl with rabbit ears isn't the first unwelcome visitor! there is also that girl with the blue cloths, blue hair, blue back pack and advanced tech!"

Reimu: "Wait... That description sounds an awful lot like Nitori! gotta find her later too and look for a way out."

Rudolph: "Oh, and let's not forget about that little raver Kanon was attacked by in the garden, I think he said her name was Parsee or something? I dunno, oh and Shannon said she found a girl in one of the guest beds, her name was Patchouli Knowledge. She seems quite calm compared to the rest, but she claims to be a youkai, and so did that Parsee!" Rudolph looked like he was torn between the border of belief and disbelief.

Kyrie: "Your joking! we're all going to have to find and capture the rest of these weird girls and ask them to be truthful, or else..." her expression seemed to turn somewhat dark.

Reimu: "Parsee and Patchouli are here too!? Yukari is so going to die for this when we get back!... Wait.. Did that Kyrie just threaten them? NOBODY CAN THREATEN PEOPLE FROM GENSOKYO EXCEPT ME!" in an outrage, the ruthless, yet clever shrine maiden popped out from under the table and pointed her shrine maiden stick thing at the surprised Rudolph and Kyrie. "Listen you two, you better not lay a finger on my fellow Gensokyo people! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME!?"

Kyrie: "ANOTHER ONE!? WHERE DO THEY KEEP COMING FROM!?" as Kyrie stared at the red-white girl, Rudolph attempted to charge and grab Reimu to capture her.

Rudolph: "Just calm down girly, we don't wanna hurt you! we just want to ask you a few questions is all.."

Reimu: "Let me-GO!" Reimu then proceeded to hit him on the head with her shrine maiden stick so he let go.

Rudolph: "OW! hey! you don't have to resort to violence ya know!" the father rubbed his head which was now pretty sore.

Reimu then ascended into the air, Rudolph and Kyrie looked in complete amazement but at the same time terror. "Now you take me to the others RIGHT NOW OR I CRUSH THOSE RANDOMLY PLACED CHAIRS OVER THERE WITH THIS!" she then conjured up a giant yin-yang ball above her head and pointed over to the chairs and stuff.

Kyrie: "O-okay! let's just not do anything drastic! please calm down now!?" Kyrie was trying to think of ways to win this little Scenario, but she couldn't think of one, let alone the fact she was up against a teenage girl who had these weird ass powers.

Reimu then made the yin-yang ball dissapate and landed softly on the floor beneath her. "Good, now then, shall we get going?" Kyrie and Rudolph sweat-dropped and escorted the over-powered shrine maiden to Patchouli.

They got to the room with Patchouli and the others in.

Reimu: "Patchy! good to see i'm not the only one who got gapped here." She seemed happy over seeing somebody else from Gensokyo.

Patchouli: "Ah, Reimu, good to see you. From the information I have gathered from the family and the servents, I have came to the conclusion that it is me, you, Parsee, Tewi and Nitori who currently reside on this island." She spoke in a calm manner, as she always would. When she wasn't getting blown up or master sparked anyway.

Reimu: "I know, I figured that out too when I over-heared these two love-birds" she gestured passivly towards Kyrie and Rudolph.

Rudolph: "You should at least PRETEND to be a little greatful! we just showed you where your friend is!"

Kyrie: "Yeah, show some appretiation for once! Gosh..." She was practically scolding her, Reimu just blanked them and continued talking to Patchy.

Reimu: "We need to get the other three here, where are they?" Before Reimu or Patchy could say anything else they were interupted by everyones favorite kappa and some other members of the Ushiromiya family.

Nitori: "*Gasp* REIMU! PATCHY!" the joyful little kappa girl rushed over to Reimu and Patchy and hugged them. "I was sooo scaaaarrreeed! that meanie over there traumatized me!" she pointed over to Battler who came into the room with her along with Jessica, Maria and George.

Battler: "Hey! who was the one who carried you on their back to a bed where you rested for likE A DOZEN YEARS!?" he looked a little irritated.

Reimu: "Well, if you were so scared, why didn't you just use one of your spell cards to blast them into little pieces or something? your more than capable you know.." As soon as she said that the Ushimoriya's looked at Nitori a little worried.

Nitori: "Now, now Reimu, you know we kappa's are human friendly!" The Ushimoriya's and servents looked slightly more realieved upon hearing that. "But then again.. I could have just built a giant machine of death and anarchy to crush them or something. And at that moment, somebody in a completely different dimension, a certain mechromancer on Pandora sneezed and looked around almost as if somebody mentioned something about her.

While everybody looked awkwardly and slightly frightened at Nitori, a couple of familiar voices were heard from the doorway.

Parsee: "Reimu, Patchy, Nitori, your here too.. Great, NOW I HAVE MORE THINGS TO BE JEALOUS OF! UGH!" it was Parsee. And then a familiar figure popped up around her.

Tewi: "Sup red-white, blueberry, book-worm! good to see ya nyeh!" it was the devious little lunarian herself, Tewi.

Reimu: "Huh.. Looks like we are all here! now to find a way back to Gensokyo.." She got lost in thought.

Battler: "Oh my god.. They are all so.. So... Flat-cheasted!" and at that dark moment, Reimu and Parsee beat him up. Reimu threw him onto the floor while Parsee grabbed his right leg and started bending it backwards, Reimu then did the same with his left arm. "OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW! I'm sorry please stoooooop! he was practically begging for mercy.

Parsee: "NEVER CALL US FLAT-CHEASTED AGAIN YOU BASTARD OF A BITCH!" both Parsee and Reimu let go of the poor 18 year old male who needed help to get up from George. Maria just laughed, Tewi did the same. Patchouli was too lazy to get up and Nitori just looked at them with a poker face.

Jessica: "Wait a minute... Deadly shrine maiden.. Little rabbit girl... kappa.. Book-worm youkai.. And a youkai of jealousy? (She had heard of the traumatizing experience from Kanon) And...You said Gensokyo right?"

Reimu: "Yeah, we're from Gensokyo, it's a sealed off border from the rest of the world, plus it's in a different dimension an-" Before she got to finish off her sentence Jessica's eyes shined like big stars.

Jessica: "O-M-G! YOUR REIMU! AND-AND THE OTHERS! YOUR FROM TOUHOU! OMGOGMGOGMOGMGOGOMGMOGOMGOMGMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGMOGMOGMOGMOMGOMOMG FAN-GASM!"

Reimu:" ...Eh?" she looked a little confused, so did the other 4.

Jessica: "You got gapped here by Yukari Yakumo right?"

Reimu's eyes widened and looked really shocked for the first time in ages. "H-how did you know that!?" she questioned the fangirl.

Jessica: "Well, in this dimesnion there is this guy called Zun who created you guys! but I guess he didn't EXACTLY create you, you are all characters in a game in this dimension."

Patchouli: "Do you have any proof to back up this hypothesis?" the book worm asked suspiciously.

Jessica: "Yeah! I know that there are others in Gensokyo called Marisa, Alice, Remilia, Flandre, Sakuya, Satori, Mima, Utsuho, Koishi, Aya and so, so much more!

Hours passed as Jessica explained what they did in the games, which is what they did (Almost completely to them, it was kinda creepy..) and the Gensokyo residents simply looked in shock. After a while things settled down a little.

Parsee: "So let me get this straight.. In this dimension we are no more then video game characters!? AND I'M NOT EVEN A CONTROLLABLE CHARACTER BUT THE OTHER 4 ARE!? WHAT THE HELL! I'M SO JEALOUS!" Parsee looked pretty pissed at the fact she was only a boss for stage 2.

Nitori: "GIRLS! GIRLS! we need to find a way back to Gensokyo remember!?" the other 4 girls looked at her and nodded in agreement. But before they and the adults plus the teens and such could discuss this any further. A scream was heard in the hallway.

George: "That sounded like Ghoda's scream! COME ON!" they all rushed outside of the room, even the asthmatic Patchouli got up and ran (Or should I say hovered) along with them.

Everybody gasped at the sight of Ghoda's corpse on the floor, his head was detatched from his body just on the floor right by it, there was blood by it. Jessica and George screamed at a very high pitched voice. Battler just stared with his eyes widened only managing to stutter words, Shanon collapsed on the floor and started crying, Rudolph and Kyrie were speechless, Chiyo cried in the palms of her hands, and the other Ushiromiya's I was too lazy to involve in the scene were very, very shocked.

Parsee looked at the corpse and just gave it a 'meh', Reimu looked a little disturbed by the fact there was a decapitated head and body on the floor, Tewi looked bored, Patchouli went through thousands of scenario's in her head trying to figure out who did it and Nitori just stared in absolute terror.

Eva: "Who...Who could have done this!?" she was trying to comfort george who was still screaming like a little girl, and then Maria started giggling. They all looked at her.

Maria: "Hehehehehehehehe! it was Beatrice uuuuuuu! she will kill seven people as sacrifices for her ressurection uuuuu! KYEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH!" everyone looked at the little girl in confusion and horror.

Battler: "No... It wasn't a witch! witches don't exist! MAGIC DOESN'T EXIST!" the Gensokyo girls gave him a baka look. "I REFUSE TO EXCEPT THE EXISTANCE OF BEATRICE!" as soon as he said that. The room was filled with butterflies, golden butterflies, everyone screamed in terror apart from the Gensokyo girls and battler, the girls were used to this kind of shiz, Battler was looking in confusion and denial and Maria was being creepy..

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHH NOOOOOO" various voices of terror where heard. The butterflies cleared, but terror soon filled the room once again when the bodies of Natsuhi (Jessica's mother), Rosa, Hideyoshi (George's father), Kyrie, Rudolph and Eva were found on the floor, lifeless with holes in parts of their bodies.

Jessica: "NOOOOO! MOTHER!"

George: "MOTHER! FATHER! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! D:"

Maira: "Kehehehehehehehehe!"

Shanon and Kanon: "*Girly screams*"

Chiyo: "No..WHY!?"

Battler: " *Cries* WHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!? FATHER! MOTHER! I WILL AVENGE YOU!"

At that moment, golden butterflies returned and formed into a woman, her name, IS BEATRICE! "KYEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEH! BOW DOWN TO MEH!"

Battler: "You do not exist! DAMMIT THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE! YOU. DO. NOT. EXIST!"

Beatrice: "Better believe it Baaaaattttllllleeeeerrrr! I am real and I KILLED YOUR PARENTS AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHHHH!"

Reimu: "Girls! PROCEED WITH OPERATION- HOSTILE MAGICAL BEING EXTERMINATION MODE!" at the moment she said that, the girls began to use their spell cards.

Beatrice: "KYAHAHAHAHA-Wait..Wha? aren't you flooded with-" she was interupted by spell card casting.

Reimu: "Dream Sign: Fantasy Seal!" Giant colourful orbs of light began to surround the deadly shrine maiden and towards Beatrice.

Beatrice: "FUUUUUUUU-" she barely managed to dodge them. "T-That all you g-g-got!?" she looked kinda shocked.

Patchouli: "Moon Sign: Moonlight Selene!" blue lasers charged at the golden witch, along with a bunch of blue and pink oval danmaky bullets, it was really pretty! :D and deadly..But still.

Beatrice: "Fack, fack, fack, fack!" she somehow managed to dodge most of them, but a few of the oval bullets hit her, but with her witch magic and crap she maaaagically regenerated.

Nitori: "You'll pay for what you did to those poor defencless humans! DIE! KAPPA SIGN: KAPPA'S CUCUMBER!" a load of green lazers fired at the unfortunet witch causing her to panic..A lot.

Beatrice: "Y U DO THIS!? oh wait I killed some innocent people... BUT STILL!"

Parsee: "Why do you get such a pretty, big dress!? I WANT A PRETTY BIG DRESS! GO DIE AND GO TO HELL WITCH! JEALOUSY SIGN: GREEN-EYED MONSTER!" Various dark and light green orbs started to creep towards Beatrice, almost as if it were a carniverous catapillar..As strange as that seems.

Beatrice: "GWAAAHHHHHH!" she tried to run away from them, but was caught and severly damaged by the danmaku of jealousy~ "Owie..."

Tewi: "Time for something original!" She charged at the witch getting up, stopped right by her, gave a sincere smile and hit her with a right upper-cut which hit her chin and knocked her down again. "Nyieheheheheheheheh!" she bounced back to the others happily.

Beatrice: "I-i'll be back! You just wait! I WILL BRING REINFORCMENTS!" she then poofed off into golden butterflies and flew off somewhere.

Battler: "Remind me.. To never upset you girls, ever."

Jessica: "That was amazing! you guys rock!"

George: "Uh, guys? our parents are dead heeellllooooo?"

Battler: "Oh, errr right..What do we do now?"

Reimu: "First! we do something..Something really important..."

Battler: "W-what's that?" he looked a little nervous.

Reimu: "We... Need food, go cook us food! oh and we could talk about that witch and stuff, but foods more important! :"

Kanon: "Well i'm not the best at cooking.. And our cook, Ghoda is dead. But Shanon and Chiyo are okay at cooking I think?

Chiyo: "I can cook fine, dinner will be ready in a few hours, Battler, go take the others to the dinning room, Kanon and Shanon your with me on cooking duty."

Battler: "Alright, see you later I guess?"

Patchouli: "I hope there is tea..."

Nitori: "I want cucumbers! :D"

Tewi: "I'm all good~ I still have my bag of carrots I took from the kitchen nyeh!" She hugged the bag greedily.

Parsee: "Why does Beatrice get to fly off in golden butterflies? i'm jealous...Again..."

And so they headed to the dinning room. TO BE CONTINUED!

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Meanwhile in Gensokyo's Yakumo Residence!

Yukari: "Ufufufufufufufufufufufu~ such amusing events! wouldn't you say so too Ran?" Yukari seemed to be enjoying this murder/wtf fest.

Ran: "It's... Interesting... But I must ask, are you going to do anything to interfere with that dimension?

Yukari: "Well...Now that ya mention it, I might consider putting an extra piece in play..." She opened up a small gap and looked through it, there you could see a figure. He was covered in blood and had a purple tux on? who was it? it was too dark to make out his face..

Yukari: "MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

Ran: "But... What if one of the girls is in serious danger of like..Dying?" Ran looked actually worried for the gap victims.

Yukari: "Don't worry! i'll gap them back if things get drastic and outta control! probably..."

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Aaaaaaaand that was chapter 4. Hope you enjoyed it. I feel like my illness is starting to go so I should be okay and my grammar should improve soon. But WHAT WILL HAPPEN NEXT TIME?! who is this mysterious 'piece' Yukari considered putting in to play? will there be more gap victims? Find out next time on this crossover fanfic that makes almost no sense whatsoever!

Also, I made a reference to Borderlands 2 character Gaige, I do not take credit to that, she belongs to Vault, not me!


	5. Chapter 5 The Extra's Arrival!

Touhou x Umineko Crossover Chapter 5

Yay chapter 5! I was gonna leave this chapter until tomorrow but I got motivated as incredible as that seems, i'm serious, me getting motivated rarely and also, I forgot to mention Krauss also died in the last chapter, so did the rest of the parents if I left any out. Sorry XD

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The dinning hall~

They were all sat at the table, Chiyo and the two servents brought the food to the table and also started to eat with them. The table comprised of Battler, Jessica, George, Maria, Chiyo, Kanon, Shannon, Reimu, Parsee, Patchouli, Nitori and last but not least, Tewi.

The dining hall was huge. The magnificiant paintings and clocks alligned against both sides of the room. There were three huge chandaliers on the ceiling but they were spaced out from each other, they had all diamond shaped crystals around them. It looked nice. Yes it did. Yes..

Reimu was looking like she really enjoyed the food, Tewi also ate it, but sprinkled some carrot bits on it first. Nitori decided to scan her food for 'scientific reasons', Patchouli ate hers slowly, naturally and Parsee looked like she was enjoying herself too.

Battler: "So then... How the heck does Gensokyo even work? what are it's inhabitents like? i'm still finding it to believe you four aren't human.." he looked at Tewi, Parsee, Patchy and Nitori.

Patchouli: "Gensokyo was created by Yukari Yakumo, well.. Or she really did was place an impeneterable border around it so no outsiders could get in unless she gapped them in. She only gapped in those who were not human and such, with the exceptions a few humans anyway. I would explain more but that would require more effort." she looked back down at her food again and started eating. Good ol' Patchy.

Battler: "Gee, thanks for the thorough explaination.." he was a little annoyed at the last part, but he was a little thankful for the information to the very least.

Jessica: "Tee hee! I can't believe you guys actual exist! *Fangirl squeal* o-m-g how is Marisa? she's my fave and I like to cosplay as her! :D" Jessica stared at the girls with sparkles in her eyes.

Reimu: "Errrr.. She's good. You know... Just up to the typical Marisa routine..Heh..." she was still creeped out about this whole 'Touhou game' thing.

Patchouli: "Marisa won't stop stealing my books! it's just so annoying.. I swear one of these days I will turn the Voile into a maze! you'll see! YOU'LL ALL SEE!" She seemed determined.

Nitori: "If ya want, I can help with the traps for the maze, it sounds like a fun thing to do!" Nitori just wanted an excuse to build more devices of war and death. She's kinda both innocent and a mad scientist, but you can't hate on her for it, she's adorable!

Patchouli: "Oh..Really? thanks, let's see, we'll need some anti-air as well as ground traps because she has that accursed broom stick of hers, she can fly without it but when I asked why she likes to fly on it, she simply said 'It wasn't very old-fasioned for a witch like me'"

Nitori: "I'll keep that in mind! ^_^" Nitori chuckled and smiled at Patchouli, Patchouli gave a small smile back.

Maria: "Uuuuu! Gensokyo sounds real interesting uuuu! but Maria prefers the Golden land better." Maria debated in her mind which land was better before.

Tewi: "Oh yeah? what's so special about the Golden Land nyeh? Gensokyo if FTW!" Tewi really loved Gensokyo. There was a lot of space for her to run around in the bamboo forest amongst other places too.

Maria: "Uuuu! In the Golden Land you can always be with your loved ones uuuu! you just have to concentrate real hard on what you desire and it will appear uuuuuuu!" The split-personality girl seemed hell-bent on defending the Golden Lands status. She wanted them to admit it was better then Gensokyo.

Tewi: "Nuh uh nyeh!" Tewi acts like a baby at times of debates. Her eyes signified that she was also hell-bent on defending Gensokyo. It was way more fun then what the Golden Land sounded like.

Patchouli: "Wait, you say that what ever you desire in the Golden Land, it manifests ONLY in the Golden Land?" Patchy decided to end the debate with just a little more info.

Maria: "Yes uuuu! anything at all uuuu!" Maria's eyes seemed filled with promise, she must have thought Patchouli was about to admit the Golden Land was better. She couldn't be more wrong..

Patchouli: "So then, technically what you manifest in the Golden Land, for example a person, isn't truely them right? say if you were to desire to see your mother again in the Golden Land, she appears.. But you know that it simply isn't her, it's just a clone, a fake clone that agree's with everything you say and is what you want her to be." Patchouli's words were icy cold, but they were right.

Maria: "U-uuu... Let's change topic uuuu!" Maria suddenly seemed saddened, but had the desire to change to a different topic. She just looked down at her food while mumbling stuff. Probably insulting the book-worm.

Battler: "A-nnnyyyywaaaaayy... So... How's the foo-" he was about to say something dull when suddenly he got an eerie shiver all through his body. "Ughughguhguhguhguhguhhh... Something bad is about to happen.. I can just tell.." He looked worried as fu**.

George: "I'm sure it's just your imagination Battler, let's just get back to eating food m'kaaaay?" suggested the dull one. And so they all did, but Battler couldn't shake off the feeling of absolute fear and dread...

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Meanwhile in Gensokyo, Yakumo Residence!

Yukari: "Okay! it's time to introduce a new piece! yes, this will make things MOOOAAARRR interesting! kyahahahahahahaha!" She seemed slightly mad, but classy.

Ran: "Oh boy..." The majestic nine-tailed fox could just tell sh** was about to go down. She looked at the sky and wondered "I hope they'll be okay...It wouldn't be the same with them." Ran truely appreciated Gensokyo, it was a paradise for gods, youkai, ghosts and majestic creatures such as herself. She could wonder around with her tails out unlike outside the border where she was constantly in a human appearence.

Yukari: "Now, it's showtime! :D" Yukari used her gapping powers to gap the mysterious figure from before onto the island where the girls and the Ushimoriya's resided, along with le servents. "Tee hee! RAN! LET'S GO GET SOME POPCORN AND DRINKS FOR THE SHOW! :D :D :D" Ran followed Yukari to the gap she opened to a market of sorts.

?: *Gap* "What...Oh... It seems I am on an island... Wait, this island...Hehehehe...HehahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! oh this is going to be so much fun.. The other me is here too." He looked around the area, he was gapped into the forest it seems. "Well then.. I guess I should start to prepare for my 'big entrance', ihihihihihihihi.." the figure wondered to the mansion, looks like he knows where he's going.

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Meanwhile in the Mansions Dining Room! again!

Reimu: "Aaahhhhh.. That meal was great! thanks again Chiyo, your cooking is the best~" The miko relaxed more in her chair, looking satasfied with a smile. She looks like she could have fell asleep in that slouched position, she's so lazy...

Chiyo: "I'm glad you liked it ^.^" she was proud of her cooking, and she liked spreading the joy her food delivered to others, it gave her a warmth in her old, fragile heart.

Parsee: "Your cooking really is fantastic miss. I have to say i'm a little.. *Twitch* Jealous..." Parsee was pretty much jealous of everything, but can you blame her? poor thing has to spend the rest of her life guarding a stupid bridge underground. Plus she was a youkai of jealousy and all.

Tewi: "Mmmmm, these carrots combined with your food is simply delicious nyeheheheheheh!" the lunarian giggled while complimenting Chiyo on her cooking, she had a devious look on her face.. But that's Tewi for ya.

Nitori: "Hmmmm.. The food was comprised of gravy, roast potatoes, turkey, carrot and turnip and various spices, ALL GOOD PEOPLE!" Nitori liked to scan her food before she ate it, it was just one of her little OCD antics, along with making sure her equipment in her lab is in the right position, her poptart supplies untouched by others and a lot more.

George: "Uhhhhhh.. Thanks for the info captain?" George said to the water loving kappa. She smiled at him pridefully and joyfully. She giggled.

Jessica: "hehe! your so awsome Nitori! I love you girls sooooo much! 3" Jessica never talk her eyes of the girls for a second, even when she was eating her food, sometimes she took a few seconds to look away, but then returned. Once a fangirl, always a fangirl.

*Thunder and rain rages outside the mansion* They all jumped, surpised by the lightning.

Shannon: "T-that sounds awfully close, doesn't it George-sama?" Shannon got a little closer to George's arm.

George: "Don't worry, i'll protect you" said George, smiling gently at Shannon. They were insepreible. They truely did love eachother.

Tewi looked in disguist, "Blech.. Love.." she giggled to herself after making that snide comment. The others simply looked at her, Shannon and George didn't even take notice of her, they were too busy getting all lovey-dovie with eachother.

Parsee: "(Awww.. They are so cute together!... Why aren't I in a loving relationship?... Love is gross.. Disguisting...Hideous...)" she thought to herself.

?: "Love truely is a thing to embrace, is it not Shrine Maiden?" said the mysterious figure who was now seated in the once empty seat next to Reimu. They didn't even notice he was there.

Reimu: "Yeah, I guess love is okay, love is something that resides deep within us all, if you can't feel it, feel harder. There's always somebody out there for you, even if they reside in a different universe." Reimu was proud of herself for that poetic comment. She had a eyes gently closed, she felt peaceful here with the others, but something was off..

Jessica: "Yeah! you said it Reimu! ...Your so strong! *More fan girl squeals*"

Nitori: "Mmmpphhh! mmmm mmmpph mmphh!" the blue-berry had her mouth full of food, so it was next to impossible to understand what she just said. They all laughed, but the figure in the purple tux, black shoes with a red tie simply chuckled under his breath. (He no longer had blood on his cloths).

Maria: "Uuuuuu, Maria didn't know their were two Battlers uuuuu!" Maria stared at the look alike. Everybody looked at Maria, felt a sudden rush of danger and fear, and slowly turned their heads towards the extra.

Patchouli: "... ... ...! W-what an immense wave length! w-who are you!?" she seemed extremely interested in something that wasn't a book for a change. Her eyes seemed a little cautious, her pose was ready, as if she was ready to use some spells.

Battler: "W-What is this!? What's going on!? WHO ARE YOU AND WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE ME!? A-ANSWER ME!" Battler remained seated, as did everyone else but they looked just about ready to get up and run. He looked pretty surprised and scared, he was shaking, almost as if he was about to die.

?: "My name is Battler... But you can call me.. Black Battler..." he went into a fit of insane laughter. Everyone but Reimu look about ready to run away, they all knew he was dangerous somehow.

Reimu: "E-ehhhh!? wait... Did you get here 'Black battler'?" asked the curious Reimu.

Black Battler: "Oh, I was just minding my own buisness, in one of my black forgeries tourturing 'my family' it's so much fun... There screams are so melodic, the blood I splatted everywhere gave what ever it touched life and colour... There corpses looked so peacful... Oh the rush I get when I kill them is simply too addictive...And I fell through this weird gap thing..." He gave Reimu a sadistic smile.

Reimu: "Gap thing? YUKARI! AM I GOING TO HAVE TO SMACK A BITCH!? FFFFFFFFFFFF- YUUUUUUUUUUKKKKKKKKKAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!" Reimu screamed so loud that the entire island echoed her voice.

Black Battler: "..." He simply gave the shrine maiden a blank expression, looking uninterested in her rant about this 'Yukari' person. "Well then... Whom shall I play with first? but don't try to break too early now, I want you to last.. I think i'll start with you..." he pointed at Parsee.

Parsee: "...Your powerful..I can tell just by being near you... I'm so... So..." she couldn't spit the words out she was practically shaking.

Black Battler: "Oh don't worry, I know your afraid.." he jumped on the table, went over Parsee, kicked her plate to the side and stood in it's place looking down at his new victim. "I want to see how much blood is in that which is not human... I want to hear your screams... I want to gouge out your eyeballs and see what they taste like, and then I-" but before the extreme, red eyed sadist could continue, Parsee spoke up.

Parsee: "I'm.. So... SO FU***** JEALOUS OF YOUR EGO AND POWER!" She screamed at him, standing up from her chair.

Black Battler: "...?" He looked at her with a some-what confused expression.

Parsee: "Jealous! JEALOUSY JEALOUSY! IT'S ALWAYS JEALOUSY WITH ME! I GET STUCK GUARDING A STUPID ASS BRIDGE FOR THE REST OF MY PRECIOUS LIFE! BUT THEN I GET GAPPED HERE AND YOU KNOW WHAT!? I WAS ACTUALLY HAVING A GOOD TIME! BUT THEN YOU SHOWED UP WITH YOUR EGO AND- AND YOUR POWER! GO TO HELL!" Parsee's eyes glowed green with jealousy.

Reimu: "P-parsee! please calm down!" she and the others tried calming her down, was simply looking at her, with mixed emotions. But then it happened...

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Cliff hanger! :D bet your dying to know what happens next right? WELL YOUR GONNA HAVE TO WAIT!... Kay bye :3 But what will become of the group now that the ultimate sadist has arrived?! will Parsee calm down? or attack? will Kanon grow taller? will Nitori ever get her pop-tarts!? will Battler stop trying to think logically and give in to WTFness? Find out next time!


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